Today…I find myself sandwiched between a day of birth and life, and a day of death and loss. You see– my daddy left us on Labor Day of 1977. And this year, it just so happened to fall on the same date as the day he went to be with The Lord– September 5th.
Tomorrow, I’ll be celebrating my birthday; nearing my mid-fifties, though I still feel like a kid a lot of times. The years between now and way back when my daddy left us, seem to have passed in the blink of an eye. It brings me to realize the preciousness that truly is each and every second of life. It brings me to realize just how much I’ve taken my days…my years, for granted!
Already exceeding the age Daddy was when he left us, I remember sweating my way up to 52. I pushed thoughts from my head that I might not make it past the age he barely had the chance to know. Alas, my worries were for naught! Though tomorrow has yet to come, I am grateful for having made it this far in life. I realize…not another day, minute, or second is ever promised! I thank God that He has given me this much of a chance at proving myself…here in the natural.
I think about all of the foolishness I’ve bothered my mind to think, and all of the time I’ve wasted away, as if time were infinite! The more seasoned I become, the more it hits me that not one single second should be taken for granted! And not one single second should be given to those who do not care to give their precious time! Time is priceless! This I often forget. So many times through-out my years, I have given the benefit of the doubt to people I thought could become friends. Knowing from first glance, every…single…time, whether or not that person was good for me! Many times, I ignored the deep-seeded feelings or red flags that were a definite sign that the friend-candidate was indeed not a good friendship match. I see now, that I would’ve been better to have let many of them just pass on through my life.
I’m not saying that some people are worthless, or that any other soul is better than another. What I am saying is that we are all made up of energy, and some energies just don’t mix. Of course, this is just my opinion. Everyone is entitled to their own. I just look back on my life, and I see…time and time again, the younger me making that same mistake. I tell my older self, fast approaching, to value everyone…but do so from afar with the soul’s whose energy does not necessarily blend with my own. Be picky when it comes to the people I allow in my atmosphere. –While remaining respectful of others…and myself. I somehow know, it’s what my Daddy would have expected from me.
So…I tell myself, like fine wine I’ve reached another year! And minute by minute, day by day, I am blessed with a multitude of second chances to do the right thing and become a better person. I embrace my number, and this phase of my life! I feel blessed to have a beautiful and healthy family; from kids on down to new grand-twins! I celebrate each moment; seeing the little things that matter in my life. I embrace new friendships with strong, self-respecting women…like myself. Women who believe, they too, are seasoned like fine wine; staying active and becoming stronger each and every day! I feel that, like many women my age, I am in a wonderful time of transition!
Yes…my hormones have a mind of their own these days! But it has just taken some time to get better acquainted with this new part of me! The little girl of my youth is still in here…yes she is! Though she knows now to ignore the version of herself she often slipped into being, throughout her trials of growing up. Mistakes…I have a made a-plenty! But they were very necessary in order for me to become a better version of myself. A woman…I truly believe I can say, my daddy would have been proud to call his daughter. –His baby, and youngest of the six he and my mom brought into this world.
And while I’ll never stop missing my father, or feeling a bit blue on Labor Day or September 5th of each year– I know that he lives on in me. I see him in the things I do…the things I say, every day. And I truly feel that my best days are still ahead! Tomorrow is another chance to be a better version of myself. To me…that’s most definitely worth celebrating!
In the wake of Hurricane Harvey, we have come to know just how much freedom really does cost. Â Fleeing the island because of a mandatory evacuation, I was glad to change scenery and break out of the rut we’d been in for over four years. Â Now, even though we are still obligated to work and try and save enough to move on down the road, we are finally back in my beloved VW Bus, Peniki.
Writing & Wanderlust 