Reaching That Fork in the Road

Home on the Beach — Galveston Island

Today, I’m thoroughly enjoying the first Saturday Nico has had off in about a year or so.  Yes…we’ve somehow fallen back into a life of being ‘wage slaves’!  –Not what we had planned when we moved to the island.  Somewhere, we took a wrong turn, and…here we are.  Stuck in the mud…again!

So we’re once again standing at a fork in the road that will lead us to ‘the rest of our lives’.  –I rewind to 2010; back when we sold everything (save a few personal items that went to storage), bought our 71 VW Camper Van ‘Peniki’, and stepped out of the rat race.

Those were the times we cherish, to this day!  We wonder how did we get burdened down again, with bills, too much stuff.  Even though we no longer keep a storage, and live in less than 200 sq.ft of space.  I know we live small by most folks’ need for ‘necessities’.  I still feel we are ‘trapped’ in an endless…useless cycle of monotony.

On one hand, we have to earn a living.  The earnings from which go to endless expenses that get us nowhere.  The time I spend throughout the day is for Baby, teaching her…guiding her, cooking breakfast…lunch…dinner, cleaning, and a ton of piddle-y things that seemingly go unnoticed…for the most part.  Time with Baby and Hubby, is the best part of my day.  Though it isn’t always time well-enough spent.

My meaning of this, you ask?  Well, often times we’ll be side by side with someone, in the same room, the same dwelling, but we are not engaged with them.  We are all doing our own thing.  –Like right now…this very moment:  I sit writing, Baby is watching cartoons, and Nico is putting his time-in piddling around outside.  We are not together, but we are still so close.

Which brings me back to our vagabond days in Peniki.  We were so close in many ways–watching the world passing by at 55 mph, as we sat gazing (holding hands…Nico and I)…talking about everything we wanted to do and the things we had already done, the miles we’d covered.  I’d look back at our babyyounger then, and she’d be sleeping or looking around at everything that needed to be discovered.  –And, all was right with where we were, where we were headed.

Back then, if anyone had asked if I’d like to be anywhere else, I’d have truthfully, and quickly, answered “No.  This is where I’ve always wanted to be!  –On the road to discovery, bumping down the highway from place to place, seeing new faces, and experiencing new adventures.  My family by my side.”

These days, if someone were to ask the same question, I would undoubtedly have my answer as-to which fork in the road we should take.  Getting there, on the other hand, is an entirely different matter.  The secret of life is that one thing, something different for everyone (from City Slickers).  It’s so simple, yet…it is so very difficult (to paraphrase a passage in Caroline Myss’ Anatomy of the Spirit).  The fork we should choose in our road, I know, will be a very bumpy one.  The journey begins today.

Many Blessings & .V..

GVR

Life After Forty — Breaking The Mold of Average

Starting Your Career After 40 —

I’ve been thinking a lot about our music today.  I guess, in all reality, I think a lot about it each and every day; even in my dreams.  Even though, by societies mold, I might be considered a bit past my prime to get my musical career off the ground, music is still inside…the songs keep coming.

In my dreams…when I’m awake, in the early morning hours, the rare quiet times throughout the day…even when I’m driving, a song is always on my horizon of thoughts.  So…in my heart, I know, He is giving me his Blessing to keep at it.  –As long as you still believe, the music is always there.

But I’m the kind of person–what most folks don’t realize–who doesn’t like to be restricted by labels or molds.  If-ever anyone says I can’t do something, or they come across as unbelievers of my dreams (i.e. our musical ambitions), then I make it a point to prove them wrong.  It may take a little time to situate myself, but I’ll eventually have my day in the sun.

Still, I feel I’ve learned a lesson by these types of occurrences, and certain people who I’ve come in contact with over the years, whether good or bad.  I’ve discovered that some folks feel uncomfortable with anyone who doesn’t blend in with the mold of normalcy.  –Something I’ve never been any good at!

For me, anything worth dreaming is certainly worth the rugged climb or a few hurdles of nay-sayers, trying to build themselves up…by bringing someone else down (I know we’ve all had these kinds of encounters).  Besides, anyone who’s anybody knows–if you allow your dreams to be corralled into the mold other’s deem fitting for you, you’ll never get anywhere but right where they wish for you to stay.  I for one, choose to break the mold of the norm, and prove these small thinkers wrong.  A life worth living is certainly worth jumping over a few hurdles to get there!

*Never let anyone keep you down*