One again…there has been a ‘monkey wrench’ thrown into our plans. *Ugh!* Tragedy struck the very afternoon of my last post. My daughter’s ‘husband to be’ and the father of her unborn baby, was killed in a horrible way. Still, I cannot believe this has happened. : (
Thus, the only traveling we are doing these days is back and forth to my daughter’s house.
I guess this goes to show: sometimes kids of all ages still need Mom’s wing. I pray for her well-being. I pray she will find love once again, or become the ‘rock’ her baby will need to lean on through out his/her lifetime. She will be the wing her child needs to survive and grow.
I know that even though, for the time being, our travels elude us, we will get back on track once the clouds all blow over. I remain hopeful. : I
Well…I thought by now, we’d be outta here! But here I sit, still in the Fort…back at the ‘Inn’; the place we’ve called home off & on for the past 6 months. In my hard-headedness, I refuse to sign a lease until we’ve made the BIG trip. The one I feel (somehow…with every ounce of my being) will change our lives forever. I don’t have apprehensions, like I do normally, instead I feel so ‘ready’ to get going on a new adventure. And while most people don’t agree with what we are up to, or how we are living, I feel that life is NOT about WHERE you live, but rather HOW you live.
As for us, we live much better than most, we just aren’t tied down with a lease and a lot of unecessary ‘stuff’, like we used to burden upon ourselves. Instead, we pay ‘one money’ and get everything we need. We carry with us only what we need in our travels; the rest is in storage…safe and sound. And…for the most part, I am happy with knowing what adventure lies ahead for us to experience.
As for baby, she couldn’t be happier…she is very healthy…she is VERY loved by Mommy and Daddy, and she is very smart because I have the time to work with her each and every day. If we were still living ‘high on the hog’, I might not have such time to sit with my sweet little girl, nor might I have the time to write anymore, or play games and sing and dance with my Nixi. She IS my life! And so is her daddy. I feel that I am a very wealthy woman. To me…wealth isn’t measured in belongings, but rather in joy and laughter. She (baby) brings so much joy and laughter every day to our lives.
And I know, once we go on this big adventure, we will be better people for having gone with our hearts and sought the life we want to have, rather than sitting for years, waiting for something to happen…or for life to fall into our laps. It just doesn’t happen. How do I know this? Because, I for one, have waited for years for that very thing; for life to happen; when all along it was happening out there…somewhere, but I was too afraid to venture out to find ‘me’.
Somehow I missed a huge chunk of my early adulthood, because my mind was elsewhere…I was not following my true calling. Though if I had traveled another path, I feel I might not be who I am today, nor might I have met such a wonderful man as my husband. I only wish I could have known all that I know now when my two adult children were growing up. I miss them everyday, though they have little time for Mom in their busy lives of friends and doing their own thing. That is why I know I must live my life now–it is time to let go and let them grow.
I am a worry-wart mom; which I guess is why my older kids do not let me know when they are having hardships, when they are not living well or doing ‘Mom-approved’ things. I tell them what I think…rather bluntly, and they usually don’t like what I have to say. So, Mom is kept at bay and in the dark when it comes to what they do or how they live. I don’t like it…at all! What mom does like not knowing what her kids are up to…at any age? None that I know of–especially not this mom.
Still, I stay busy with baby. I still have one child under my wing. I have to get it right this time. And I figure, by the time Nixi is old enough to know better, we’ll have settled somewhere; hopefully in a small community of peaceful folks who don’t see color or race so much as these rednecks around here do. This city is a RAT RACE, no place to raise a child. We want to be able to get out and walk, ride our bikes, go to the beach, forage in the woods, survive on our own efforts by growing our food and such. That is the life we seek. I pray and remain hopeful.
Things turn out as they are meant to happen…most of the time. The signs are always there. It is up to us to pay attention and follow our heart. It will never stear us wrong.
Soon…we will follow our hearts off into the sunset. I know there is a better life waiting for us…just over the horizon.
God Bless & Happy Travels!
Our Home on the Beach
November 23rd 2010:
[If we make it through December…everything’s gonna be alright, I know.] I’ve always loved that song. And the way things sometimes seem to go for us, I just hope we can ‘make it through December’. Christmas, the holidays and all, always seems so ‘heavy’ on us. All the expectations of others: presents, a big spread of food, the picture-perfect story many love to ‘knock themselves out’ creating. Not I…not anymore!
For so many years, I practically killed myself trying to ‘do it all’, though it so-often seemed to go unnoticed…unappreciated. These days, I’m taking the high road and veering off-course when it comes to family traditions. A nice barbecue on the beach will do nicely…thank you!
Either way, I know this is the season of giving. So..that is what we plan to do, but in a way that really makes a difference. I just had to get that off my mind. Thanks for reading! ; )
Happy & Healthy Holy Days to All!!! God Bless!
October 5th 2010:
Gotta be quick on this one, ’cause baby doesn’t like waiting much. So…Here goes!
It’s been a while since my last post, but there’s a reason for this. I have soooooo much to tell, but no time to tell it. Between baby and a broken-down laptop that won’t let me open my browser windows…at all, I haven’t been able to keep in touch lately.
All in all, we’ve managed to travel to the Guadalupe River…River Road, on our birthdays in early September; just in time for the hurricane winds to blow through and force us to evacuate to higher ground. Longer story to come, when puter is fixed. : )
No worries on that detour really. We went to San Antonio instead, and waited for the weather to clear; saw Hubby’s best friend while in town…barbecued at his place. ‘Got back to our hotel room to find our little Blanca dog had chewed the place up; a whole door in fact, of particule board. We, of course, had to pay for the damages. Oh joy!!!
‘Finally got to the river though, we camped for a few nights and tubed only once; baby doesn’t give much time for that sort of thing, so we went in shifts. : )
Duty call! Ugh! : D
August 11th 2010:
HONK if you LOVE, Love, love Vintage Volkswagens!!!
This could be the headline for an article on what happened to my husband yesterday while he sat at a red light.
There he was at the red light, when a super-snazzy…restored VW Bus pulled up along-side him containing a woman and her brood of children in the back passenger seats. She had gotten Hubby’s attention even before she came into view; beeping her horn with approval of our Westfalia (not quite so shiny as her bus, but still way Kewlio). With equal approval, Hubby beeped back.
Then came the chorus of beeps! It wasn’t the bus beside him, Hubby realized, but instead…the melodic beeping came from behind him. Looking in the rear-view mirror, Hubby could see two classic VW Bugs flashing a peace sign-thumbs up and a friendly wave. Hubby waved back. And…his day had been made.
What can I say…! If you’re happy and you know it–and you just happen to be driving a super-cool, perfectly classic, vintage Volkswagen–feel free to honk your horn! We are one…we are Vintage VW enthusiasts!
Thumbs UP….and Peace back atcha Man! Cheers & Safe Travels! We’ll see ya down the road. : D
Our Happy Lil Baby
Have a 'Beachy' Holiday
August 10th 2010:
It seems like everywhere we go these days, we get a thumbs-up or a peace-sign. Hubby and I feel like we are in a parade…but in a good way. : ) Nah… I’d be lying if I said the Westy isn’t a blast to chug around town. We’ve been called the ‘Hippie People’ more than once, but we don’t mind a bit! After all…we were born in the 60’s. Gawd, that makes us sound sooooo ooooooold! haha
There’s no argueing the point that we are getting on up there in years. I’ll be *gulp* 42 (bahahahaha) in less than a month. I really don’t feel a day over twenty…most of the time….except at night when baby wakes us up…when I’m pedalling the old cruiser bike up a hill….when I look too closely in the mirror with my glasses on or try to see without them at all. It is at these times when I am reminded that I’m no longer a ‘spring chicken’ as my sweet momma used to say.
I am looking so forward to living a full life when we actually get our shiwawa together and hit the road for the long-haul. Still…we are here…for now, right where we are meant to be, for reasons we cannot always understand. The only thing I can do is learn from it all: Stay off of ebay, get more stories out there when baby lets me, and work more diligently at the things that, perhaps, might change our futures and that of our loved ones…the kids mainly.
I know our best life is out there waiting for us to come fill in the blanks that someone…somewhere is feeling because we are not there. So…I guess for now, I will plan and do more research on…research. : D There is a bit of time to relax and enjoy the day with my little Nixi. If only my older two kiddos and my hubby were here…it would be great! I feel when we find our place in this world…once and for all, everything will just fall into place.
Cheers to the best life we can live…one and all! Ching Ching and Happy Travels!!
August 5th 2010:
Well…not much has changed since last week, but since baby is sleeping-in this morning I’m gonna write a bit about my nothing-doing…just to amuse you all. As our story goes, we are still stuck in the subs…in a different locale. We are at least out of the hub-bub of the city and more out in the country where I can ‘breathe’. Finally…!
I’ve been working a lot with little Nixi; sitting her on the little pink pottie when I have to ‘go’. Heh um… She is doing great for her first try at pottie-training, actually T-T’d twice in one day…yesterday. I am soo proud of her! Daddy was very proud too! : )
But…on to the subject of the Westy and our travels (or lack of such). Needless to say, we are counting-down, crossing our fingers that nothing else goes wrong with the van: three weeks…tops, til we head down the road and outta town. *Hoping…hoping* I’ve done research after research on our intended destination. We know where we want to be…to live…to nurture little Nixi. The hard part seems to be just getting-going or getting there. Still…I remain hopeful.
We finally broke-down and ordered the Zoom Q3 Audio/Video recorder we’d been needing and wanting for a looooong time. The sound is superb, just like real-time, live sound. So…the next step is to record our music…send it out to Gov for copyright, then we continue with the making of our first video. Yes…we are in the process of making a video for our first original release. For a long time, I’ve been putting off my music.
My mother used to tell me to give-it-a-go; so many people have encouraged me…even strangers through-out my singing career. But none-so more than my husband. He won’t let-up for a minute. He believes in me…as a singer/songwriter, as a strong woman who is ‘sometimes’ too willing to let the world beat me down. It’s almost like I’ve never believed in myself…that I could actually make it in the world of music. It’s really funny how everyone can see what I’ve never been able to notice.
I guess we’ll see what happens. Wish us luck! We’ll soon be posting our work on YouTube. I hope you-all will go and give it a listen when I include the link in a future post. We hope you like what you hear.
God Bless and Happy Travels to everyone who is actually out there ‘living the dream’! : )
July 28th 2010:
Little Nixi is 10 months-old today! Yay!! But, other than that, and because we are still ‘stuck in the subs’…
Ugh!!! The Cavewoman is back!
July 27th 2010:
I had a moment of quiet, so I thought I’d write a thought or two while I have the chance. ‘Made my deadline…my latest piece is submitted and published online; ready for your reading pleasure. It’s been a rather uneventful day, but I’m not complaining…at all, none what-so-ever! The last time I commented on the quiet day, it all went to shit! So, I’m saying…just for the record, I LOVE QUIET DAYS! lol
No really…. Tomorrow is the big day: Nixi turns 10 months-old. I am happy and sad…all in one feeling. Happy because she is soooo beautiful, healthy, and such a playful…happy baby; sad because she is no longer a single digit number, and is closer to being a year-old than….not. I know I’m not really making sense, but…if you’re a mom, and you have a little one who’s grown like a weed…right before your eyes, you know exactly where I’m coming from.
My other two kids are now young adults–I blinked and they were grown. Yes…there are days I feel overwhelmed because, as all mothers know, the job never stops…you rarely get a break, and you tend to let yourself go a bit…in comparison to how you were when you actually had some time for yourself. It is now almost 4:30 in the afternoon, and I ‘just now’ put on my face and tried to make some sense outta my tangled hair. Yes…I do comb it, but I usually use my fingers because it is so fine, and kinda crazy at times. Hubby loves it…thinks it’s sexy. Men…! They just love bed-head. Only reason I can think of as to ‘why’ they like a woman’s hair messy is, well…, pretty obvious.
Okay…so I’m rambling-on, trying to think of what I tried to remember not to forget. Funny how the 40-something mind doesn’t cling to a thought for long; at least mine doesn’t anyway. I won’t complain! I’m very reluctant to piss and moan about anything these days; too afraid it might go and get worse. No matter how bad things can sometimes get, I know, they can always get worse. So…I try to keep a stiff-upper-lip and be happy…even when I’m really not.
I feel like we’re stuck in the mud…really. I’m as antsy as any woman can get; like a gipsy who can’t find her home. That’s it! I’m a gipsy who can’t find her way home…. A woman of wanderlust…just looking to roam. ‘Could be a song…never know. That’s how my thoughts work: like a song…always in progress…never ending.
Hubby and I have written several songs, I feel I should mention. The words and music just come to me…sometimes in dreams. I feel I am either blessed….or possessed! lol No…really! I have this way about me: thoughts I must confess to music. But when I do sing the feelings of my heart, I find it hard to sing at all for getting all choked up. If I could only get past that…I’d be just fine.
So…keep on the look out! We’ll be posting our songs on YouTube asap. We finally broke down and bought some recording gear we can carry along on the road. ‘Not a lot of room in our VW Westy. That’s not a problem. I’m soooo hard-headed, I always find a way. I may be ‘not so great as I once was’, but I refuse to throw-in-the-towel. I have dreams that even if I bull-headedly refuse to follow…somehow, keep following me. I wonder if Someone is trying to tell me something. Only time will tell.
July 23rd 2010:
Okay, so I had a bit of a melt-down this morning. Sometimes I can’t hold it in; it seems to happen at certain times of the month. *no brainer* But, I can’t help but feel sorry for my poor husband, who is always there to be my leaning post.
This time, however, my set-back was due to our crazy schedule, the events of the past week, and also because I just needed some LUV! : )
As usual, he made it all better. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to have a man who requires so little: eggs in the morning…eggs at lunch…eggs at dinner; my husband loves eggs, needless to say. No…really! He does love his eggs, but he really is there for me and baby, he is the rock in our family…he just doesn’t realize it, I suspect.
By the time he was off to help his brother at the shop, we were all better. He came home for lunch, and now…I look forward to seeing him this evening. I’m currently researching a story due in a few days, so I guess we’ll be trekking off to take pics for the story and experience the subject-at-hand…first hand. Gotta love the crazy life we are now living! We wanted to step outta the ordinary and live a more exciting…unpredictable life. Well, I’d say….we got our wish!
July 21st 2010:
Well I spoke too soon yesterday when I said it had been a relatively quiet day. I should have just kept it to myself, because the day sure didn’t end that way. Oh man! So…in a nutshell.
We (hubby and I…and baby) had been staying with my mother-in-law’s Tia (Aunt in spanish), and his mom since she has been there for more than 4 years…tending to her, since Tia’s alzheimers has been rapidly progressing. It is a sad…sad case, that Tia–widowed for quite a few years–had been left to fend for herself before my MiL came along; never mind she (Tia) has a son living in another state, and several grand-daughters. Well, just in the past six months or so, Tia’s youngest grand-daughter has decided she wanted to take over, was granted power of attorney over Tia’s estate, and gotten her own father thrown out of the will.
So…here we were a few weeks back, ready to hit the road…when the brakes began locking up on the van. We were held over, so hubby’s mom and Tia invited us to stay with them until we get the parts delivered and the brakes fixed. We took them up on the offer; hubby began helping the aging women out around the house, we offered to give money, but no one would take it. We were appreciative.
Then…enter the grand-daughter–I’ll call her CM. She decided she would move in to her grand-mother’s house with her three kids, two of them infant twins. Not our business. So…here we all are in one house–it was driving me crazy, and I wanted to leave asap…perhaps ‘yesterday’…everyday, but we were always talked in to staying by my MiL.
Well, yesterday, the shit really hit the fan when CM decided to start throwing her weight (believe me…she has a lot of that) around and bossing us ‘just because’ hubby and I took MiL out to eat without Tia, who was supposed to go stay with the neighbor across the street. My MiL never gets away, she is never compensated for her 24/7 care and work, but still…she gets ‘reprimanded’ by the little piss-ant CM for leaving without Tia? BS!! Still, the little troll CM, has had the nerve of out right flirting with my husband–I never said a word to her…just let it pass–and even called him up last night with an attitude asking where my MiL was and why wasn’t she home watching Tia? The nerve! Where was she!? Why couldn’t she watch her grand-mother?! The bad thing is…poor Tia is in and out of memory, and doesn’t always know what is going on around her.
Anyway, when I told the little troll not to be calling my husband–after we never got a real answer to how she’d gotten his number in the first place–she copped an attitude and told us to leave. So…we did. But, I am still a bit put-off by her. It isn’t my business what happens with CM and Tia, but my MiL deserves payment for services, and the “B” CM doesn’t need to be calling my man.
Now, we are held over in FW, waiting to replenish funds, and get the van ready to wander. I can hardly wait! I can only pray for someone who would throw a family out in the middle of the night. I’d hate to have her karma coming back at me. >: )
Happy travels to all!
The Tent arrived just a short bit ago!!! I can hardly wait to set it up and dreammmmm! : ) Just a little at a time, and we’ll soon be ready to hit the road. As the old saying goes: Rome wasn’t built in a day!
Our Vintage Drive-Away Tent. Awaiting its Arrival...
July 20th 2010:
Okay…so we’re still waiting on a few more loose ends, but we’ve made a lot of progress (see before/after Westy pics below). Hubby is helping his bro out at his body shop to replenish funds of what-all we’ve spent on our van. Now, I anticipate the arrival of our ‘Super Cool’ Vintage VW Drive Away tent, which will not only add some much-needed privacy, but will also be like adding a whole room to our van space. It has the floor in it and all, with screen-zip windows and doors…and an awning that doubles as a front door. Of course, I found it on Ebay…as I’ve found everything we’ve had to buy for our van. Gotta love Ebay!!
So…now, since baby is sleeping, I am updating this blog even though I don’t have a lot to report as of yet today. Been a relatively quiet day so far, which is a good thing…I must admit. : ) Now, I am simply researching jobs around the country…even abroad, while I wait to hear back on a travel piece I submitted last week. ‘Should be hearing something any day now; hopefully anyway. Those are the breaks when it comes to freelance writing. Even though I am really proud that my book was published a few years back, I still have to keep the nose to the grind stone–or fingers to the keyboard–and keep at it. Success…I hope will find me someday.
That’s life! ‘Gotta love it. Cheers and happy travels to all!
Our Westy at last photo documentation. She’s come a looooong way in less than 2 months. Things are looking up! : D
July 16th 2010:
Another week, a few more parts, quite a bit of dough later…and we’re still getting ready to hit the road. No one said it would be easy, and believe me, it hasn’t been. We just keep doing what feels right, all the signs are pointing in the direction we’re steadily working towards. A little voice inside me keeps saying just to “Keep on keeping on! Nothing in life worth having is ever easy.”, so I just take my own advice, suck it all in…and try harder to reach my goal.
The Westy is getting closer to road-ready; one brake/caliper/line installed…one more to go. Then, Hubby will check the two front brakes to make sure no servicing is needed there. Ugh! I feel like a cavewoman these days. All I can say is “Ugh!”. *chuckle* In reality, we’ve come a long way with our little campmobile in a short month-and-a-half (Has it really been that long?), but I remain hopeful that we will be heading down the road in no time. *crossing fingers…toes…legs…arms* I feel like a child who’s anticipating the last day of school, but it keeps getting pushed back. I feel like a kid who’s been waiting for my mom or dad to come play a while with me, but they keep finding better things to do with their time; yet again, I have to wait.
I know there is really no one at fault here, any more than my own self, for buying a 39 year-old classic vehicle that had been sitting for years before we came along and rescued her. She (Peniki) is a true classic, she deserved the name plate stating such status. The sad thing is…she is just like me: she doesn’t have alot of mileage, and I suspect she’s never been any place too far, but she desperately needs to wander and see the creations of God…of nature…of man…of the world.
I feel like a caged lion at times; like George Bailey in It’s a Wonderful Life — I feel like if I don’t get away…I’ll just bust! So…here I sit, writing this blog post, hoping that someone…anyone, might feel compelled to read my words and comment their words of understanding and perhaps share some feelings of the same sort.
TGIF! We’ll see what the weekend brings. God Bless and Happy Travels to one and all! : )
Sunrise View on Our Maiden Voyage
July 6th 2010:
Okay…so we’re feeling a little ‘stuck in the mud’ these days, dealing with the layover-limbo kind of waiting game. What are we waiting for…you ask? Well, we are still waiting on parts to make the VW Westy road-ready.
First it was one thing…the permanent plates for the van, then the title, then…we discovered we’d need to replace a few parts to get the Westy inspected. Ugh!! Now, we are waiting on parts to fix the brakes on our ‘Yes we do still love her’ campmobile. I’ve received notification that our parts are on the way. A glimmer of hope is still in my eyes.
So now I sit writing this post in my blog that I barely have time to keep up with lately. Even though we are waiting…we are very busy getting ready for the road trip. I’ve also been researching work, places to go, things to do, so on and so forth.
Where we are headed first is anyone’s guess; and believe me, everyone keeps asking. “Where are ya’ll? Where are you going? You still in town?” Exhausting…completely! I know they all mean well, or perhaps they are just being a bit ‘nosy’. I’m sure I could guess, but I won’t say.
Either way, and even after some drama on our first outing–mean-spirited RV park snobs looking down their noses at our lifestyle, at us, at our a-little-rough-around-the-edges camper van. None of it–they, rather– just doesn’t matter to us.
We see our baby growing so fast and so strong…she is so happy; we know we are doing the right thing…bringing her up in a modest, low-key lifestyle. We see that she doesn’t need all of the stuff that people tend to lavish on their children, simply trying to make up for the time they do not spend; too busy working, shopping, whatever!
Hubby and I might not be agreeable to many ‘conventional robots-wage slaves’ but we are spending the most valuable commodity ever available on our baby. We are spending time. Priceless!
Our Dream…Come to Life
June 11th 2010:
So…it’s been almost a whole month since we went and picked up our 1971 VW Westfalia Campmobile Van, and I still cannot believe she is ours! Anyone who knows me, knows how long I’ve wanted one of these classic, none-other-like-them-in-the-world camper vans.
I ‘m in love with my car! Is that a little odd? I don’t think so in the least. You see…? She–Peniki–as we have named her–is our passport outta the rat race. Sorry to say, we are waiting on a few loose ends before we can hit the road. But, all in all, it’s been a great adjustment time; getting used to cohabitation in a camper van as opposed to a traditional house, like we had been living in for the past several years.
‘Glad to say, we have taken that first BIG step out of the conventional lifestyle (the one everyone thinks they are ‘supposed’ to live) and already sold everything we own…cars and all. Now, we are left with each other (our MOST valuable…no, priceless possessions ever), our Super Cool Hippie Van, the belongings we’ll need on the road, and a half-full storage unit of the stuff we had to keep. ‘Always a few strands of ‘red tape’ we can’t cut through…no matter how hard we try.
So…we are waiting…and waiting…and waiting for the loose ends to be knotted, then…just like that breeze that’s calling, we’ll be chuggin down the road. A couple (and a half) of Nomads…we are! I’m lovin’ every minute of it. Who was it who said that nothing in life worth having is ever easy? I wish I could remember. But, no matter really. This adventure, so far, has been an exhausting undertaking–definitely ‘not’ for the faint-of-heart. I sure am glad that I inherited my hard-headed ways from my daddy. Any time anyone has ever told me something might be impossible, or a bad idea, well…that’s the very thing I’d do. My parents always told me that curiosity killed the cat. I sure am glad I’m not feline. : )
There’ll be more to come…
Our adventure has just begun!
So…I never thought I’d be able to say this so soon, but…”We Found It!!!” “We found the Westy for Us!”. Now, we just gotta save a bit more, and the puppy is ours! YAYA!!